30 Days of Heart: Day 10


co-Ed baby shower

I can end there and literally all the guys reading this will throw their hands up and complain, and all the ladies will sigh and say how sweet.  The second thought some of you are thinking is I thought this was a blog on Heart, and speaking of heart you have been going pretty deep and dark about the mind the last couple of days Johnny.  That is why I have great news.  We are having a party.  Not a party where we go to but right here, right now we are going to take time and celebrate.

It is day 10 of my blog.  That is a third of the way done with my 30 days of Heart theme.  That is something to celebrate.  I don’t know many things I have done 10 days in a row.  No matter how big or how small you think it may be I want you to take a few seconds and just think of something worth celebrating, and I want you to give yourself a high five, shout for joy, pat on the back, or just get a really good cheese face going and just sit back and say yeah I did that.

You see sometimes we can get so worked up about what we have failed to accomplish that we miss all the things we actually do, and do well.  Like for instance I went to a couples baby shower tonight and it was awesome.  I mean the demeaning game they put all the husbands through where we had to taste different baby foods and guess what they were was not as fun as the bottle chugging contest.  (I didn’t win but I apparently didn’t know all the rules- you could squeeze the bottle. Instead I just sucked it down and came in last.)  That is ok but back to the nasty food.  You parents need to try that crap.  It was disgusting.  I literally almost vomited and if you watch the video already on Facebook.com you will see the sincerity of my pain.  Okay,  so the game was actually fun and not demeaning at all, but don’t tell our wives because I think we all convinced them they owe us one or two for that.

As I looked around the room and saw everyone laughing and having a good time, I couldn’t stop to think how is everyone’s journey actually going.  Was this a normal feeling they feel, or was it a face they made to cover pain?  Was it just a fun silly time for them, or was it a really good distraction from all the crap they are going through?  Writing this blog more than anything I think has made me more compassionate as to how I see people, and how I see myself.  We can get so self absorbed into our own problems that we actually stop seeing people.  We just see problems, worry, pain, shame, overweight, underweight, mortgage, bills, kids issues.  We can stop taking the time to celebrate.  You, yes You reading this blog, you are special and you do amazing things.  I know because I am awesome as well.  I am not some beat-down loser who never finishes what he starts.  I am just getting started. Who cares if it was later than some? I am getting started.  I am starting to feel again, I am starting to breath normal again (most of the time). I am human, with a human heart, but it supernaturally beats.  It is my inner man, the seat of my emotions, passion, and purpose.  You have purpose, and God will not rest nor stop till you know He is passionate about you and what you are passionate about.  Let us continue to dive in to all that we were created for.  We were created not for work, but for love.  Love bears much fruit.  Love brings community and support.  I took the biggest risk in the last several years by starting this blog and look: in a week 148 people from 3 continents have read it.  Many of whom have given me public and private encouragement.  It has meant the world to know I am not alone.  What is better than not being alone, someone who has gone through it and made it out on the other side.


self discovery without community is impossible

You can truly only discover who you really are only by opening up to others and risking everything that you think makes you up.  Your safe place, and your comfort zone are not those at all… but road blocks that the enemy puts up in your place to keep you separated from the world you were supposed to interact with and help change.  I may not know you if you are reading this but I just feel so connected with you.  I know you are good, and you will do good things in life.  You will accomplish your goals and dreams because from this day forward you will not keep them hidden inside, but you will find someone or a group of people who are ready to hold each other accountable to the dreams that are placed inside you.  I am not speaking from wishful thinking, but I am speaking from simply 10 days for diet, exercise, prayer, meditation, worship, reading, writing, exploring.  Can you imagine what is going to come out of me a year from now?  What makes people an expert on a subject is not a degree but experience.  I have experienced something these last 10 days that I haven’t in my whole life.  No lies to anyone or myself.  Self discipline only because I have had community support. I am both a beginner and expert because I am alive and have something to offer.  You do too and do not let anyone tell you otherwise.  Do not use your knowledge to puff yourself up or put others down, but to impact the world around you and stir passion in both yourself and others around you, then you will fulfill your purpose.

My name is Johnny and I am on a journey to Get, Grow in, and Give my heart.  Will you come with me?

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